Doorways Offering Passage - More Doctor Junk *sigh*

So it's now time for the left breast to get its' biopsy, and probable extension in the armpit as well. *sigh* My friend Claire (aka "Chickie Mama") will be there once again as quiet support. She's been an absolute rock through all of this. Where DH will rant and rave and not really know what to do, Claire just quietly supports - no questions and no expectations. Exactly what I need when I'm being selfish and totally self-centered. 

I don't enjoy being totally self-centered, but I'm not going 
to allow myself to be pushed into a corner, either. I'm going 
to roll with the waves and eventually land on a new shore. 
Then I'll explore this brave new world I've been pushed into. 

I don't enjoy being self centered, however. I have always taken care of myself (except when I haven't - consciously), and I really don't expect anyone else to walk paths next to me. DH tries, and fails more often than not. Claire is surprisingly effective, just a quiet voice and a gentle nudge. 

DH doesn't listen very well, so my whispers 
tend to be lost in the dead air. He's having to pay 
attention now, and he's not liking it at all. 

Today's appointment is a bit earlier than the last one, I'll need to be at the cancer center no later than 10:00 am. They have a two hour block of time reserved for me - it's three different procedures they'll be doing. It's going to be similar, in some respects, to the fancier mammogram I had earlier, with tissue samples and the placement of a reminder nodule that will show up on imaging as a target center. Of course, I'll also be back on the 4th for some last minute surgery prep, and on the 5th, I'll have my breast surgery. The question that comes up is what type, and where? Originally I was scheduled for a lumpectomy on my right breast. Now? I'm not so sure that we won't be working on both breasts, and that I might not have a recommendation for full mastectomies instead of the mini-me versions. 

There are options - there are always options. I'm not 
a very vain person, so I'm far more focused on quality 
and length of life than whether I have breasts or not. 

I've never really placed much personal value on my exterior appearance. If I end up losing both breasts, I might have to look into getting a frontal tattoo after things have healed up thoroughly. I'll have plenty of time to research what I might want, and to save up for a trip to South Carolina to see Rodney. I wouldn't trust anyone else to do my inkwork. It would be VERY expensive, and I'll have to start saving up for that if I decide to go ahead with it. 

The difference between DH and myself is that I will 
see the new door and want to wander through it, 
whereas he will spend far too long looking for the 
doorway that is now closed or invisible to him. 

But, as the saying goes, when one door closes, another opens up. I fully expect that in my life, and I am focused on that because focusing on the negatives just isn't my style. Therefore, have a fantastic last day of January and I'll be back for February 1st. Be kind, to yourself and others. Slava Ukraini. 

I Apologize and I'm Sick at Heart - What a Disappointment!

I offer my apologies to Ukraine. With it almost a certainty that Trump will be in the White House for another four years (and how our nation will ever survive that is a good question), our support for Ukraine will bite the dust. Our promises will drift in the wind, our funding will disappear. Trump has made no secret that he'll pull out of the war in Ukraine. His "buddy" Putin will be delighted. He'll have an open road to Kiev. I'm absolutely sick at heart. 

I'm sick at heart. I haven't been this depressed over 
an election in my entire life. I really hope we make 
it through the next few years without a world war. 

I've lived through Nixon, through the Kennedy assassination, through election after election, and the nation has somehow survived all of the variety of Presidents we've elected. I have to hope that this will also be the case now. But Trump reminds me all too much of Hitler, and we all know what Hitler managed to do before he finally took his own life. We're in for a very bumpy ride, people. We're going to be maneuvering our way through the asteroid belt by the seat of our pants. I only hope we still have a democracy in four years because this will be challenging. 

I'm sick at heart. I'm quite sure I'm far from the only 
person who is looking at our immediate future with 
a bit of fear. I really HATE living in "interesting times". 

That's about all I can say right now, except that I'm very grateful I'm old. No matter what happens, I won't have to experience it for more than about 20 more years - 30 at the most. That's probably better numbers than most of my readership. Sometimes being old is a very good thing. Have an excellent Wednesday, I'm off to the swimming pool. Slava Ukraini. 

A Scary Time on Sunday - Protesters vs Tanker Truck

It's 6:00 am on Monday morning. The curfew just lifted and the freeways are once again open for traffic. Oh ... you didn't know? Well, Saturday and Sunday new tactics came into play and the expanded forces of the police, state patrol, city police and National Guard shut down the freeways. On Saturday they closed at 8:00 pm, but on Sunday there was a massive march of 5000-6000 people and groups of that size in our area tend to walk onto the freeway and stop all traffic. For safety, they closed the freeways around 5:00 - 5:15 pm. Then this happened. 

A tanker truck barreled into a huge crowd on the I-35 bridge.
  Here's a link to YouTube if you want to actually see this idiot. It's a
rather remarkable video, but some might find it disturbing, so I'll
leave the clicking up to you. 

Yeah - a tanker truck appeared on the empty highway and barreled into the crowd doing at least 30 mph. It then slowed, almost stopped, and then sped up again, before finally coming to a complete stop. The driver was pulled out of the cab and beat up, because he had just been stupid enough to drive into a crowd of people. After he was taken into custody by the police, he was treated at a nearby medical center and placed under arrest. It broke the momentum of the demonstrations, though, and people began to split off, most leaving the area completely. It's a shame, it was a great group - very cohesive, very peaceful and very positive. 

For a really interesting video and interview,
here's another link.
The interview is rather lengthy, but well worth the listen. 

So, I'll be leaving in an hour or so for the shop. Although the nights have been much more peaceful, I have no idea what might be awaiting me. I'm hoping I'm untouched, but I could come in to a bunch of graffiti. Who knows? Living in "interesting" times isn't for the faint at heart. 

I hope your beginning of June goes well. Please stay safe and I'll be back tomorrow.