Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Here's a Sexuality and Comfort Question For You...

An acquaintance of mine (J) was recently given tickets to see Cher by her husband who accompanied her to the concert. She's a huge Cher fan, he's not, but he knew his wife loved the singer and wanted to give her an experience that she would remember for the rest of her life. So they dressed appropriately (she's quite the glam queen) and saw her while they were on vacation a couple of weeks ago. I happened to see J recently and asked her how the concert was.

"Fabulous," she gushed.

"And how about his Imperial Badness? Did he enjoy the concert too?"

"Well...not so much."

Cher, now in her upper 60's, is still a very attractive woman and
a rare talent in the field of entertainment. 

On further inquiry, it was revealed that the reason IB didn't like the concert wasn't the quality of Cher's performance. No, the reason IB didn't like the concert was because of all the gay men seated in the rows directly ahead of them. Apparently having a large group of gay men "...twittering and gesturing and dancing..." directly in front of him brought his hetero-armor to the front.

She continued her explanation and said that although he normally was not a demonstrative person in public, he put his arm tightly around her shoulders, pulling her against his body, and held her there for the duration of the concert as if to say "I'm not gay. I came with a woman, not a man."

Public displays of affection are fabulous. I didn't feel that IB's actions
were a PDA, however, rather almost a heterosexual battle stance. 

I was amazed, to tell the truth. That he would feel so threatened by homosexuals in close proximity to him floored me, and it got me to thinking...

In any group of women, you're probably going to have several women
who are not heterosexual, or at least who are not exclusively heterosexual.
I don't find that to be a problem or a reason for me to feel
uncomfortable within the group. Is my feeling of comfort that unusual? 

As a woman who has friends and relatives who are either gay or lesbian (and a few transgender), I have never felt threatened by them in any way. To be clear, I'm a female who is 100% heterosexual. There's no longing or desire hidden deep within me for a female to share my bed or my life at all. But I also have no issues having females or males who are gay as friends, or going out on the town with friends of any sexuality. I'm just not threatened in that respect.

I have to ask, so I'm throwing out the question. Is IB's reaction common? Do males feel more threatened by close proximity with homosexuals than females do with lesbians? Do they mind the thought that someone may be admiring their body who is of the same sex? Personally, although my body is nothing much to look at now, I was always happy to be thought of as attractive when I was younger and more slender. In fact, as a teenager and young woman I was striving to be attractive, so acknowledgement by my peers as well as the opposite sex was welcome. Do you, as a female or a male, feel threatened when someone of the same sex looks at you admiringly? Would you feel threatened in a similar situation as IB found himself in?

Why does IB's reaction seem to be a modern day version of donning
plate armor against an enemy incursion? 

So please share your thoughts on this. Do you feel threatened in any way if someone of the same sex compliments you? Do you feel on edge if you are in a group of gay people of the same sex? How about if those gay people are of the opposite sex? Still threatened? Or not? Give me your reactions and arguments because I'm really curious if IB's reaction was over the top (as I feel it was) or if my lack of reaction unusual or also over the top in the opposite direction.

Happy thoughtful Tuesday...

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